Things may never work out the way we think or the way we think we'd like them to but, they always do work out and when you realize that you don't make the calls and you don't get to decide 100% percent of everything thing that happens in your life you become more content.
Old memories surfaced today unexpectedly and it was a challenge for me. I was really encouraged this morning at school for whatever reason. As I was sitting there in class day dreaming just a little, it occurred to me how I can sometimes be so disorganized. I made a plan in my head to come home and literally go through everything up and down. I was feeling pretty psyched. Although it takes much energy I love deep thorough cleaning/ throwing out old junk that clearly isn't needed. I don't get to do it much cause I don't have that much time in my days. Anyways, so there I am walking in to Walmart kind of distracted by different things but trying to stay on my path of where I was going so I wouldn't buy unnecessary things when I look up and there he is. My heart sunk and I felt like I might have puked. I continued to walk and we walked right past each other with out saying anything. Which in my opinion I preferred. I don't know if it was the right thing but it was better than standing there having a conversation with someone you can't forgive. (I know not a good thing) I was so caught off guard that even though I went there for a couple of things I grabbed the main thing I needed and got the Hell out of there. Some would say my reaction to this situation was un called for but I don't.
I was feeling better when I started my journey on de-cluttering and cleaning. As I was going through things I found some things I wish I didn't have. A reminder of the past that I thought I had forgotten and gotten rid of, but I hadn't. It put a damper on me. I keep every card that I recieve from someone for some strange reason but it's days like these where there is some good to this. In my frustrated mood and all around interesting morning I picked up a card that in that moment was just what I needed to hear. From the person who I love more than anything in this world. The words on the page softened my heart and it was the best thing in the world. These are the times where I realize that the little things in life are so important. A valentines card down the road can raise someones spirit who's having a bad day.
I ended up cleaning for about 5 or 6 hours straight and although I'm so damn tired right now I feel accomplished. Things are clean, the walls are bare ( I took all my posters down) and I feel content. I wanted to box up the silly childless things that reminded me of my past. Not that I don't want to look at them from time to time but this is the time where I need to start building my adult life and stop hanging on to childish things. I don't know if I'm making sense but it sounded better in my head. Anyways, that was my day. It's been good and productive.
Tomorrow is Friday and I'm so happy. Looking forward to doing some fun things and hanging out with fun people :D
Old memories surfaced today unexpectedly and it was a challenge for me. I was really encouraged this morning at school for whatever reason. As I was sitting there in class day dreaming just a little, it occurred to me how I can sometimes be so disorganized. I made a plan in my head to come home and literally go through everything up and down. I was feeling pretty psyched. Although it takes much energy I love deep thorough cleaning/ throwing out old junk that clearly isn't needed. I don't get to do it much cause I don't have that much time in my days. Anyways, so there I am walking in to Walmart kind of distracted by different things but trying to stay on my path of where I was going so I wouldn't buy unnecessary things when I look up and there he is. My heart sunk and I felt like I might have puked. I continued to walk and we walked right past each other with out saying anything. Which in my opinion I preferred. I don't know if it was the right thing but it was better than standing there having a conversation with someone you can't forgive. (I know not a good thing) I was so caught off guard that even though I went there for a couple of things I grabbed the main thing I needed and got the Hell out of there. Some would say my reaction to this situation was un called for but I don't.
I was feeling better when I started my journey on de-cluttering and cleaning. As I was going through things I found some things I wish I didn't have. A reminder of the past that I thought I had forgotten and gotten rid of, but I hadn't. It put a damper on me. I keep every card that I recieve from someone for some strange reason but it's days like these where there is some good to this. In my frustrated mood and all around interesting morning I picked up a card that in that moment was just what I needed to hear. From the person who I love more than anything in this world. The words on the page softened my heart and it was the best thing in the world. These are the times where I realize that the little things in life are so important. A valentines card down the road can raise someones spirit who's having a bad day.
I ended up cleaning for about 5 or 6 hours straight and although I'm so damn tired right now I feel accomplished. Things are clean, the walls are bare ( I took all my posters down) and I feel content. I wanted to box up the silly childless things that reminded me of my past. Not that I don't want to look at them from time to time but this is the time where I need to start building my adult life and stop hanging on to childish things. I don't know if I'm making sense but it sounded better in my head. Anyways, that was my day. It's been good and productive.
Tomorrow is Friday and I'm so happy. Looking forward to doing some fun things and hanging out with fun people :D
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